Dr. Shakila Angadi, The Inspired Dentist, realized how much dentistry had become an identity when it was abruptly taken away from her. She shares her techniques for growing in emotional intelligence and the impact it has on who we are.
“Dentistry was all I knew… for me it was really a struggle with identity”
When Shakila received the nerve-related diagnosis that would force her to step down from dentistry it was crushing. Suddenly her sense of worth was taken away from her, and she started asking herself some of the hard life questions:
“Will I have a career again?”
“Will I have something that gives me purpose again?”
“Should I just accept that I’m alive?”
“Am I asking for too much?”
For Shakila, her identity was wrapped up in her being a dentist. When practices right now start limiting the amount of treatment they can give due to quarantine, other dentists might be feeling the same way she did.
“The longer I took with fighting what I was feeling, the longer it took for me to get through the situation”
Shakila knew something was wrong because she couldn’t sleep, she was overwhelmed, and was searching for something to fix it. Her biggest piece of advice on the other side is to learn to stop and listen to what your emotions are telling you.
“Start looking at our emotions as information instead of points of weakness”
To better grow the emotional intelligence of the clients she works with, and for doctors looking to sort through their mental awareness, Shakila created the ABC’s of Emotional Intelligence
Acknowledging
Before anything else, we must affirm what it is that we are feeling. Acknowledge the pain, the anger, the sadness, the frustration. Permit yourself to admit that this isn’t what you wanted. It’s vulnerable to enter that part of our feelings, but it opens the door to resilience.
“Our vulnerability is the key to figure out who we are”
Being
Now is the time to discover “who you are” apart from “what you do.” Learn to be mindful of where you are, take time to meditate, and visualize who you want to be on the other side of this. Even when our work stops, we continue.
“No amount of doing leads to more being”
Creating
Finally, we want to start creating a new rhythm or routine that promotes emotional health. Find outlets for your emotion through music, writing, or creative problem-solving.
“Just like working out… it’s how you show up for yourself and your mind and your wellbeing every day that makes you stronger.”
“If COVID is the chance for us to evolve… we won’t come out of this situation the same way.”
Disruption generates change. We can come through on the other side of this not letting our practice ever control us again. If you would like to learn more about Shakila’s approach to emotional intelligence she has provided a huge amount of free resources on her website.
